Looking for a way to melt those stubborn holiday pounds? Sick of that same old pilates routine?
Well, do I have a product for you!
How much would you love a machine that works your core, your arms, your thighs, your back, all at the same time, AND provides a heart-healthy aerobic workout, all in one simple motion?
Oh, and did I mention that there are no pulleys? No elastic bands? No weights? No batteries and no assembly required? Didn’t I?
Well, love, just you wait and see. It’s simple. It’s effective. It’ll rock your body, and your yard, with no sweat, whatsoever. Guaranteed.
Introducing. . .
The Shovelex Frostmaster 3000!*
-Lightweight!
-Portable!
-Hangs for easy storage!
Only $39.95! Free trial at my house!
*Snow not included. Exercise caution when shoveling plow berms, as cramping may occur. Consult your physician before beginning any new fitness program.
We recommend you complement your purchase with the Shiatsu Massage Chair!
Or the accommodating husband of your choice.
OR you could just get that heart rate up by teaching middle school students all day. . .unfortunately, it doesn’t burn as many calories–but it should.
Okay, you are so funny! I love your sense of humor!